Are You an Upholder?
"Upholders are those people who readily respond to outer and inner expectations alike. They meet the work deadline, and they keep the New Year's resolution, without much fuss." (27)
Hopefully by now you've take Gretchen Rubin's quiz to find out which tendency you are, but ask yourself if you think these quotes apply to you:
- "You observe the rules even when it's more sensible to ignore them"
- If there is a bathroom marked with the opposite sex, you are unable to use it even if it is a single bathroom
- You like crossing items off a list
- You feel uneasy about changes to routines, habits, or schedules
- Planning is your thing and deviating from it can be tough
- After a tough day, you would feel guilty or worse if you skipped a scheduled workout as opposed to letting yourself off the hook
Now that's just a quick, quick, quick rundown of some of the characteristics of Upholders, but hopefully you see my point. Upholders can meet the outer expectations and also meet their inner expectations for themselves. Upholders are often reliable though, they follow-through on what the say, and stick to a schedule. Strengths include "self-starter, self-motivated, conscientious, reliable, and thorough."
All tendencies have a weakness though. You may find Upholders can seem "cold" when plans change or diverge from what is expected. They can be uptight and rigid with what they want - if they want to stick to a schedule, that may seem a bit excessive. Bending of rules makes them anxious or nervous, and, now this is not from the book but my own opinion, but taking risks that may break the rules does not sound appealing. Upholders may also have trouble delegating work because they know they can do it and do not know if others will do as good of a job. They will also get frustrated with others are not on the same wavelength or expectation level as them.
What do you think? Does that sound like you? Or do you know someone who falls into this category? Well if you know that about a person, that can help you in your interactions. If you are frustrated because your coworker or spouse isn't being "letting loose" and doing something that bends the rules, it may be because they are an Upholder. Or maybe you have an appointment and the Upholder is pressuring you to get ready quickly so you won't be late - don't take that as being mean or cold-hearted, that's just who they are.
Famous Upholders: Hermoine Granger
Post inspired by The Four Tendencies by Gretchen Rubin.